Your favourite half-light. (ebeda) wrote in antiwoman,
Your favourite half-light.

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Notes from a Lurker.

I am a member of a women's fraternity.
No, it is not a sorority.
A fraternity is created to exist solely in and of itself, in order to serve and benefit others. Our philanthropy is breast cancer awareness and research.
With this in mind, consider the following.
Our fraternity has 40 members. Many of these members are experiencing a sense of neglect or unconcern when it comes to other members in the group. There are cliques. When choosing what other Greek organizations we shall donate time/gifts/etc, no group decision is made - it is based largely on who is dating whom. Many members are going through rough times in their familiy/academic/whatever lives, and yet there is no sense of concern from other sisters - in fact, many sisters have long ceased to even ask that time-tested conversation-filler, "How are you?" When they do ask, they rarely - if ever - mean it. Knowing the ideals my fraternity is supposed to strive for, I am disappointed in the group's singular lack of concern for these ideals.
Thus, spurred by my own distaste for what my beloved fraternity is becoming, and numerous complaints from other sisters, I arranged for a special meeting, required of all sisters to attend. Less than half actually showed. I said my piece and opened the floor for discussion. I was crucified forthwith.
From there, the entire conversation lapsed into alternately expressing incredulity at my sentiments and telling each other how wonderful they think everyone in the group is. Threatened by my honesty and no-bullshit attitude, they lapsed into affirmations made at the cost of truth.
I hate this.
(Warning: Generalizations will follow! Be not alarmed!) When men disagree, they are open about it. Sometimes, they'll even yell and/or scream at one another about it. But when women disagree, they run for cover. We must not wound anyone's feelings - unless, of course, the rest of the group is also casting stones, in which case it is perfectly acceptable.
Comments, questions, concerns? I'd appreciate feedback.

And as Happy Noodle Boy would say... "Moo."

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